Intensity	Stupidity:Nudity Ratio 9:9	Budget None

Virgins of Sherwood Forest? Wait. Don't virgins usually refrain from having sex.

On the set of a music video shoot, the rock star is busy doing one of the interns instead of hitting his mark. The director, Roberta, is frustrated by his prima donna act and as she storms off the set, she is smacked in the face with a board and collapses. When she awakens she is in a forest (albeit one with paved walkways). She meets people that look familiar but have different names and do not remember her. It turns out that she is in Sherwood Forest where, having vanquished the evil sheriff the year before, Robin Hood is resting on his laurels. At the one year anniversary party of the triumph, the Sheriff's sister shows up and hauls the Merry Men off to the dungeon. Roberta spends some time having sex with Little John and helping to organize the local women to storm the castle and rescue Robin Hood. After successfully completing the mission, the new sheriff's shows up again at the camp and in the ensuing fight Roberta is knocked on the head again and wakes up back on the set.

Sybil Richards, directors of such movies as Femalien (1 and 2) and Lolida 2000, tries her hand at retelling one of the classics, the story of Robin Hood. To make it even more fun, she bookends the piece with a Wizard of Oz plot device. Turns out the time Roberta spends in Sherwood Forest is actually just a dream she had while she was knocked unconscious. We meet Roberta (Gabriella Hall, "Sex Files: Alien Erotica" and the Click series) on the set of Alvin's (Brian Heidik, "Who killed Buddy Blue" and Survivor) latest music video. He points out that the set is really cheesy and Roberta reminds him that that is the look they are going for because it is "fun". Alvin decides that he no longer wants to be a cowboy but wants instead to be Robin Hood. Wow! Foreshadowing!

Okay, lets not make any mistakes about this, this is a Cinemax soft core movie. Sybil Richards made a bunch of these primarily for Cinemax and then later VCR and DVD release. For various reasons many of these films were severely cut for home release (thanks Blockbuster) but some of them retain their carefully edited soft porn in its original form. Typically these movies would involve some silly plot that was primarily advanced by dialogue. It is much cheaper to have a character explain what happened than to actually show it. Someone would walk into a room, expound on a plot point or two and then have sex with someone. These being primarily shown in America, you might have a boy/girl scene and certainly a couple of girl/girl scenes and possibly even a girl/girl/boy scene but never any boy/boy scenes. While you might get a glimpse of pubic hair on the actresses, the guys would always be wearing a sock. No, not on their feet, think Red Hot Chili Peppers. (Go ahead, I dare you, do a Google Image search for Red Hot Chili Peppers Socks.) Frequently these movies would feature models and porn stars. In this case, bondage stars Alexis Taylor and Darby Daniels show up along with Amber Newman who posed for lots of magazines and starred in such films as "Stripper Wives" and "Dungeon of Desire". On a side note, I recently watched the new Dr. Who series as well as the Torchwood series from BBC. Captain Jack Harkness (a character that appears in both series) is not only bisexual, but also seems willing to hump anything that moves. Frequently he is shown in close embraces with other male characters. American TV series and PG movies can have male gay characters as long as they don't do anything like kiss or touch another guy. Women, on the other hand, frequently get to kiss other women. Especially during ratings sweeps.

I think the thing I like best about Virgins is that it is so good natured. Even the evil Sheriff just doesn't seem that bad. Robin Hood is on an ego trip, but the men still respect him. He is still true to his cause even when the Sheriff's exercises her feminine wiles on him. Of course, normally this might imply playing sweet and innocent or possibly tempting him with sex. Yeah, right. Not in this movie, she throws him on the bed and starts sucking his toes. Everyone plays the movie pretty loose and relaxed. They seem to know they are in a low budget soft core flick and say their lines and take off their clothes on cue. It should be noted that the script is actually pretty good. No, we are not talking Shakespeare but there is a setup that explains the whole Robin Hood fantasy. When Alvin decides he wants to be Robin Hood instead of a cowboy and Roberta tells him that the sets are supposed to be cheesy, we are being prepared for the lack of set decoration and the noticeable lack of Merry Men. Alvin's shallowness is mirrored by Robin Hood's selfagrandisment (by the same token, I wonder if Robin's sticking to his principles means that Alvin is actually a good musician?). The evil Sheriff Serena is a reflection of Roberta's PA, Nina, who it turns out wants to be a director also and when given the chance goes from mousy to bossy. Incidentally Nina/Serena is played by Shannan Leigh who would appear in lots of bondage videos under the name Alexis Taylor. In Virgins she gets the line "Pain and Pleasure; two opposites, yet they tend to elicit the same response". Rather a nice line but wasted on the oblivious Robin.

So is the movie worth seeking out and watching? Not really. It is a good example of its kind and it is good natured in that while some of the characters are idiots they are not held up to ridicule. While the writing may be pretty good, most of the running time is taken up with sex scenes so there is not a lot of dialog. The reasons for watching the movie are along the lines of Amber Newman being particularly cute, Shannan Leigh in leather shorts and watching Jason Schnuit's complete lack of facial expression.

In my "research" on this title I found out that Surrender Cinema DVDs are being sold on the Full Moon site. In typical Full Moon fashion they meticulously went over every detail before adding the DVD to their line up. Note that the description from their site states that the main character's name is Nina. Not once, but twice.

Got a comment or different opinion? Send a message.